Amazing This Way

A mother and her daughter talk about colour and confidence

by Pranuthi Bunyan | With a poem by Sanchitha Rahael Sathyadass

As a mother, I have heard people come up to us and make statements such as, "Your younger son has a better colour than the others!" And this would at most times be in front of the kids. It's ridiculous!

Our three kids, Sanchitha (12 years), Tharan (9) and Vivaan (3) are three different shades. We consciously reinforce to them that each shade is precious--one chocolate, one coffee and one caramel! 

Also, we emphasize that God has created each one fearfully and wonderfully and makes no mistakes!

Sanchu, as we call her, is a born artist. She loves to dance and sing and is a part of a children's choir called "Shine," and has formed little singing quartet called the "Four-tunes"! When she was in public school, she was sometimes ridiculed by her classmates for her colour. It would make her upset at first.

One time my eldest son was made fun of at school; one boy called him “black Tharan” in front of me. I immediately asked the child if Tharan's hair and face were the same colour. When he sheepishly said no,  I told him to learn his colours better!

While there are people who are around who make senseless statements, there have also been others who have been an encouragement. There was an opportunity last Christmas when the two eldest kids were featured in a music video. Opportunities such as these and focus on their inner strengths and gifts, have been the main factors in developing a confidence that we have seen, especially in Sanchu over the last few years. We hope that the two boys will also develop their strengths and live as confident people.

When asked to write for Dark is Beautiful, Sanchu was apprehensive initially. But when we told her that this was helping to campaign for a cause that it would help bring awareness to several others and help create a world that is free of discrimination on the basis of colour, especially for the next generations, she cheerfully agreed! In a matter of minutes, she said a little prayer and had the poem thought out, typed out and formatted!

Amazing this way
by Sanchitha Rahael Sathyadass, age 12

Black or white,

Red or blue,

We are the same,

And that is true.

Lotions, perfumes,

Face washes and soaps,

Make you think that

You should glow.

Washing your face 

And applying cream

Is unnecessary.

You look amazing

Just this way,

Cause dark is beautiful,

And that’s what we say.

Surviving Discrimination - The AJ Franklin Story

“Though She Is Dark, She Is a Nice Girl”
By AJ Franklin | A Dark is Beautiful campaigner

Growing up, I was teased by classmates for being a crow, urged by relatives to apply fairness creams and finally, when it came to marriage, I was told in advance that people would expect lots of dowry from my family because I'm dark. 

According to most of my relatives, we had to enlist me in a matrimonial services provider, so we went to a suitable one and I filled in a host of forms. On each form, after the basics, there was a slot for skin colour. I went ahead and ticked the box that said “dark complexioned.” 

The person in charge read the form and made a funny face at me, as though I had made a stupid mistake. She pointed at the skin colour box and said, “Please change that to ‘wheat complexioned.’” 

I asked why, and she rolled her eyes at me and said in Tamil that it was standard procedure for any girl of my “karuppu” skin to tick “wheat complexioned” to boost my chances of “catching” a groom.

On Raising Children

By Kavitha Emmanuel | Director, WOW

The issue of skin colour goes deeper than we would like to admit. It is actually more than just ‘skin’ deep; it is in our hearts. How does this bias against people of a darker skin colour, really affect the way we live and relate to others? 

I have a daughter who is 5 years old. I would like to describe her skin colour as 'golden brown'. She is my honey bunch. My hope and dream for her is that she will grow up believing that she is beautiful just the way she is. In South India, she probably does not fall in the category of being dark-skinned, but neither is she really fair. 

I am, at the moment, considering adopting a child. I have asked myself this question, “What is my preference, in terms of skin colour, for the child I would like to adopt?"  My first thoughts were that he or she should be of a similar skin tone to that of our daughter. I couldn't bear the thought of one of them being darker than the other and have people make comparisons or comments that would be hurtful to them. I would not want them, in turn, to compare themselves to each other and, perhaps, echo the unfortunate but common opinion that the lighter one is better. I do empathize with parents who are faced with this situation. As parents we want the best for our children. 

We live in a world where we suffer discrimination in various aspects of life - rich against the poor, upper caste against the lower caste, men against women. We discriminate on the basis of religion, profession, designation, status and SKIN COLOUR! Let's wake up to a new world where we spread love and acceptance rather than prejudice or bias.

If I adopt a child and he or she is dark-skinned, I will do all I can to let my children know how beautiful they are. I will teach both my children to rise above the limitations that the world might try to place on them because of skin colour. We need to teach our children to soar!